Behavior Makeover: Anger
The situation
I'm really starting to worry about my eleven year old. He's a great kid with a good heart, but has such a temper! Whenever he's upset, he kicks and punches anyone or anything in sight. I've tried withholding privileges, giving lectures, and even spanking him, but nothing's working. He starts middle school soon, and I'm afraid he's going to be the class terror or expelled. Kamil, a mom of four from Las Vegas, Nevada
"I'm really worried about him. He gets himself so worked up when he's mad."
"I'm afraid he's going to get in serious trouble: he lashes out so quickly when he's angry."
"If she could just tell the other kids she's upset, but she scratches and pinches instead."
Clenched teeth. Rapid breathing. Red face. Teaching kids a new way to cope with their intense feelings is not easy, especially if they have practiced only aggressive ways of dealing with their frustrations. The good news is that although violence is learned, so is calmness. Learning any new habit takes time, especially expressing anger more constructively, so don't give up! If you're consistent, you'll be able to help your kid learn a healthier way to handle anger. You may also be able to help him discover the source of his anger.
More on: Behavior
Excerpted from:
From No More Misbehavin' by Michele Borba, Ed.D. Copyright © 2003 by Michele Borba. All rights reserved. Used by arrangement with John Wiley & Sons, Inc.
Buy the book at www.amazon.com.
