Talking About the Spirit of the Season
by Carleton Kendrick Ed.M., LCSWIs It Just About The Presents?
With the hustle and bustle of the holidays already in high gear, you may start to feel a little out of touch with your family. But the holidays aren't just about presents and parties. It's time we get to spend with our loved ones. Here are some ways you can bond with your kids and make a difference in your community this holiday season.
Teenagers have big hearts. They feel intensely about everything -- that's their "job" developmentally. This holiday season, why not tap into that boundless reservoir of feeling by asking them to join you in giving to others?
During the holiday shopping season, advertisers are bombarding them with even more pressure to ask for those "must have" teenage popularity items -- high-end, designer name clothing, CDs, cosmetics and so on. Why not ask them to redirect some of that gift list energy, and think about giving to people in need.
Giving Together
It's really not difficult to get your kids to volunteer with you. Try one of these approaches with your kids. Just remember, it's never too late to make a difference.
Ask your son, "What do you wish you could change about the world?" He might look at you like you have two heads at first, especially if you haven't tried anything like this before, but press on because the effort is well worth it.
If you find it a little awkward getting the conversation started, tell your son what bothers you about the world. You could say something like, "Seriously, hon, today I passed four homeless people on the street and I thought, well my pity isn't going to nourish them tonight, why don't I try to actually do something positive. Then I thought of you and that maybe we could do something together."
If your daughter loves animals or children you could suggest volunteering for a day at an animal shelter to walk dogs or bring home-baked goodies to sick kids or the elderly in the hospital.
Once you get your teens talking about what problems they care about, you can come up with a perfect plan to share some kindness.
I have volunteered weekly at my town's food cupboard for many years. I have witnessed what happens to teens when they have helped us in our food drives, held fund-raisers for us and baked holiday pies for our clients. They are transformed. During those moments, they become who they really want to be -- thoughtful, caring kids who want and need to give to others.
There are books to be read to blind children and adults, food to be served at shelters on Christmas Eve and Christmas day, toys to be delivered to orphanages and hospices and songs to be sung in nursing homes. So many good deeds waiting to be done, by your teen and you.
